I got up at 7 a.m. and realized that my co-worker and I were supposed to go to Birmingham for the day, but we never resolved who was going to pick up the state car that we would be driving (we work for the University of Alabama). So I went to the office in hopes of finding her and ended up tracking her down by phone. After several other difficulties, we finally were on our way. The day was pretty boring but plenty frustrating. I won't go into details, but trust me on this one. We did have a pretty good lunch at a place called Moe's, which is apparently a chain. I had a chicken queso burrito. Their tortilla chips were multi-colored.
One really good thing about the day was that I didn't have to drive, so I got to read more of Passion & Purity, which is quickly becoming one of my favorite books. It's changing the way I view myself. I find myself reading it and thinking that when I get married, I want it to be like the way Jim and Elisabeth Elliot's... I don't even know what to call it. Courtship? It's making me think about how I want so badly to pursue God with more passion and to be so close to Him that I want His will for me more than anything else. But at the same time, I am realizing that while I'm thinking about these things, I'm thinking about how it will be cool to have them so that I will marry the right person, or so that when a man pursues me, He will see the kind of relationship I have with God. WRONG! This is not the right attitude, and it's the attitude I'm really trying to make it past. I'm praying that God will help me to pursue these things because of Him, not because of these silly dreams I have for myself. I know that God always has my best interests at heart, so I really pray that I can turn my desires over to Him and live for Him only. What's pretty cool is that, in the book, Elisabeth Elliot talks about many of the same things. Here's an excerpt from the book that I really liked:
Jesus knew human loneliness in its most poignant forms. As a boy of twelve, He was misunderstood by His earthly parents. His obedience to His Heavenly Father caused them grief. In His public ministry He was usually with crowds who came after Him to see what they could get out of Him or to criticize, cross-examine, attack. With those twelve whom He chose as His intimates, there were arguments, misunderstandings, and in the hour of His greatest need, abandonment. Only in the flesh could Christ enter into our destiny, understand our temptations, and be fully Redeemer and Savior. Who can save us who does not come down into our sufferings and experience our pangs? There was nothing I was experiencing that He had not been through in some form. The love that is everlasting had entered this world, my world, my very heart, known its struggles, shared its weakness and perplexity. None of those things then would separate me from His love. They would, in fact, give me the opportunity to experience it, to learn to cry, "Abba, Father!"
It really helps to know that Jesus has experienced the same desires that I experience now.
So, another highlight of my day is that I got to talk to Laci, my friend who has been in India for the past two months. It was really great to talk to her and hear about her trip and tell her a little about mine. I think she's going to come visit next weekend. I'm excited.
I'm about to go to a Mary Kay party with Jess, so I'll stop the update now.